I wish we could let go of the lies, secrets, and hurt between us. “I don’t know if it’s possible.” I wish it was. I roll my eyes, flopping back onto my pillow. And even if he was…” she trails off, a devilish gleam in her eyes. “Why? It’s not like he’s your stepbrother anymore. “Valen! Did you not hear anything I just said? She’s not going to find out. Taylor is going to die when she finds out.” “This just makes my petty heart so happy. I hear Valen’s muffled laughter and I pull back, looking at her with my eyebrows raised in question. “I’ve made Valentina Solorio speechless.” I half-laugh into her sweater. Valen goes through every emotion as I spew my verbal diarrhea, and when I’m done, all she does is pull me into a hug.
Everything I’ve been holding in spills out of me like an overflowing bathtub, but I can’t stop. I tell her about the suspicions surrounding Danny’s death, about Grey’s weird behavior, and how Holden and Thayer think he might have something to do with it. I tell her about seeing Taylor there in his room later that night. I tell her how I told him I loved him, and he told me to leave. I tell her about the night of the funeral, when I nearly gave him my virginity. Taking a fortifying breath, I decide to tell her everything. Valen mimes zipping her lips and throwing away an invisible key. This is one conversation I don’t want my mom overhearing. I widen my eyes at her, gesturing toward the door. “You fucked your stepbrother, didn’t you?” “I knew it!” she exclaims, slapping the mattress. “Before Danny died, Thayer and I were…together.” Sort of. But there’s no harm in telling her now that there’s nothing left to protect, and I could use someone to talk to. I felt like if I said it out loud, it would jinx it. I wanted our secret to stay safely tucked away inside our barn without anyone else’s opinions or judgment interfering. But we didn’t tell anyone, and things didn’t just fall apart. We had to hide for so long that I got used to lying to everyone around me. So we took to stolen moments when no one was looking, and spending nearly all of our time in the barn. We knew it could ruin our family, that we ran the risk of being separated if anyone found out. For so long, we met in secret, knowing it was wrong, but unable to stay away from each other. I don’t know why I’m having such a hard time spitting it out. I rack my brain for the right thing to say.
“Let’s start with the fact that Thayer carried you off like a caveman in front of the entire town.” “I don’t even know where to start.” Taking the hair tie off my wrist, I throw my hair into a messy bun on top of my head. “Whose jacket is that?” She tugs at the hem as I crawl back into my bed, pulling the blanket over my lap. “You have no idea,” I mutter, padding back toward her.
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